not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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