you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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