i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize