Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
