Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
