I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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