dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
