White coat. Heels.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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