i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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