I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
