is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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