Christians are straight up FREAKS
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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