I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
