He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
