i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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