A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize