Where is the hickey?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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