well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
