I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
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Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
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She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
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