TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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