I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
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The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
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You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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