I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
