Your tits are I can't wait for
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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