Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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