I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
