I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize