Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm sobbing to NWA
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
