Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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