hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize