Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
