god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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