He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize