Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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