Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
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