xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
