I feel like abortions should bother me more
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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