what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
