You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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