marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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