Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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