Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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