people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
