I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
