from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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