I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
