hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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