I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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