You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Randomize