I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
