You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
