Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
