So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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